The Dark Lord

The Dark Lord

Member Since 3/9/2026

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1448 points

Malevolent Gen X dungeon dweller, creeping through the tight dark spaces, dragging chains and heaving cumbersome blobs of congealed iron repetitively in Sisyphean fashion. Overlord to a multitude of screaming, salivating, gnashing minion monsters, co-managed with the evil, Dark Witch sorceress who spawned them.

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The Dark Lord's Reviews (125)

(4.33)
4/25/2026
Solidly built and very affordable. I really like it as a squat alternative on secondary (lighter) leg days when running undulating periodization. Good quad and glute emphasis without the fatigue of compressive spinal loading. The quick attachment on the neck is padded with smooth plastic so it won't mar the finish on your rack. Or you can set it up as I did, on a dedicated 4x4 post that can then serve as storage space for the unit when not in use, as well as more plate storage. Since a 4x4 wooden post is actually only 3.5"x3.5", it's barely wider than the 3x3 rack upright and the neck of the belt squat arm will mount easily if you just back off the allen screws on the crossbar by a couple turns. Loaded to 350lb with the dual horns and the vertical plate holder all on it, it moves smoothly. Does require some getting used to in order to find your balance point but after that it feels like it's going to be a permanent part of the leg days rotation. My only gripe on the build is there's a little wobble in the vertical plate holder but nothing that's dangerous. Easy to assemble with channel locks and a socket wrench, the disposable one they included with the dual horns is a joke, throw it away. The included belt is perfectly adequate but nothing special. The kickstand was included with the purchase; if it's not, then wait until they offer that deal again.
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(4)
4/23/2026
Highly sought after vintage deep dish plates, made in Oakland, CA in the 1960s; a collaboration between Paul MArtin and Rudy Smith (creator of the Smith machine). They took two letters from each of their names and that's how the MARS brand was born. Watch the Massenomics video with Efren above for more details. Not very many sets of these plates are known to still exist but there may yet be more out there floating around, especially in Northern California. These were used by some of the most famous lifters of the Golden Era scene in California. Their manufacturing process wasn't the tightest... one of my 5s fits on any modern powerbar but the other barely slips on some and won't fit other 2" sleeves. The plate weights for MARS are also notoriously inaccurate. Lastly, they cost more than is justifiable for ordinary use, unless you're an insane collector bitten by the deep dish bug.... but here we are nonetheless.
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(5)
4/14/2026
This thing is seriously challenging... rapidly made me feel like a girly man. Now I'm questioning many of my life's choices and wondering if I should've gone into a more physical line of work, like my father told me to... but nah, screw that guy, he only said that because he didn't believe in me. But Brian Shaw believes in me... and by golly I'm not going to let him down. So I guess this new toy gets added to the regimen a couple times each week.
Performance
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(4.67)
4/14/2026
i've had this bar for a little over a week now and used it several times. I'm perfectly satisfied with it. I suspect their build quality has improved substantially since the COVID review above. There's nothing wrong with the welds and the bar feels very solid. The cerakote is all intact and it arrived shiny and crisply new, no rust or any other issues. It weighs a touch over 25 lb and has good knurling on the interior posts. 6.25" of loadable sleeve space, more than enough for challenging weights for me, but if you're an absolute beast make sure you've got slim collars. Yes, it's a budget friendly no name bar whose purpose is just to be functional... it meets that goal. no one is going to be jealous that you own it... that you can still make them jealous of the guns you build with it.
Performance
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(4)
4/9/2026
Very inexpensive, and honestly they feel that way. The plastic lever feels like it might not stand up to rough use for very long. They slip on and clamp down easily, but if there is any weight vibrations from repeated drops, you will see a tiny bit of plate migration by the end of the set. I used these for some heavy BB rows and got almost 1cm of play in the plates by the end of the set. There doesn't seem to be a way to increase the tension in the clamp, so you just get what you get.
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